It’s in the turning towards yourself that you are cultivating a new and different way of living.  A conscious way of learning about yourself in a different way. 

I’ve been doing conscious self-understanding work for at least the last 10 years. I say 10 years because before that, the work I was doing on myself was all about the physical. Even when I first started practicing yoga almost 20 years ago, the focus was still on the physical. I was understanding how much of a warrior I was in the physical sense, but not in the spiritual or mental-emotional sense.

Warriors Tend to Turn Away Emotionally

I have a natural tendency to turn away from myself when life gets crazy around me. You might too…it’s completely another way of numbing or checking out so we don’t have to really feel anything. In times of stress or chaos, we revert back to our natural training, to what we can do on auto-pilot, and if you’re like me, that means you’re likely not really recognizing your feelings.

Even after all this time of being on this self-understanding journey, I’ve only recently realized that I have this tendency to turn away from myself when life gets crazy around me.

Like when all the kids are home over break, and we have a house full of people or are traveling to see other people and the things that calm my nervous system or make me feel my best don’t nearly get the time that they usually do. In all actuality, the things that truly make me feel safe and comfortable are connecting with myself on my yoga mat, with journaling, contemplation, meditation and inner child work, but when chaos starts to happen, my ego wants to jump to the rescue and do things like keep me busy, avoid confronting feelings on paper or in my mind, workout, and be social with others for the sake of being social rather than deeply connecting.

Turning Away from the Physical As Well

And this year even my yoga practice got put aside a bit over the holidays because of illness, constant people at our house, traveling and the honest desire to want to sleep in and give myself a break from waking early every morning. Folks, I’m not kidding when I say there were days when showers were optional and I had to have serious conversations with myself about washing my face for the day. It completely reminded me of that time in every newborn parent’s life when you are simply doing the things you need to do to survive.

Auto-pilot

I believe it’s said somewhere that you don’t rise to the occasion, but rather default to your training. And although I’ve been training my brain and body systems to do the things I know help me thrive, I still have moments or seasons when I default to auto-pilot. And that auto-pilot means the conscious self-understanding and intentional living work went out the window.

Rhythms and Routine are Easier

Because I want you to know it’s a human thing and it happens to everyone. Your body craves routine. It has natural rhythms to remind you of that. But when routine stops, you move in this space of both freedom and chaos.

You have the freedom to do whatever you want, but without boundaries or established patterns of connection, the chaos around you nudges you to revert back to old habits and patterns.

Routine is so comforting, yet when you have to surrender to those times of being out of routine, you get a glimpse at what your natural tendencies are.

Turning Towards Yourself

It’s in the turning towards yourself that you are cultivating a new and different way of living.  A conscious way of learning about yourself in a different way. 

You heal hurts.

FEEL what your heart and body really want to communicate with you.

Even if you’ve been practicing a more conscious way of living for years, you might still have those moments when you fall back into old habits, it’s just part of the journey.

Becoming aware of those moments then being able to make the time shorter between when they happen and when they don’t.

And it’s about eventually getting to that place where you can anticipate being out of routine and take the steps to do the things so that you aren’t letting those disruptions in routine cause you to turn away from yourself.

When Unexpected Things Arise

Practicing yoga is one thing that helps you learn to flow even when unexpected things come up. If you can handle chaos going on around you on your yoga mat and still stay present with your breath and focused on your practice, or quickly bring yourself back to your breath, you are well on your way to flowing with life and moving with more ease through life.

Knowing your energetic rhythms is another component or thing that helps you with this as well.

But sometimes being out of routine and other life circumstances that happen at the same time, compound the effect so much so that it’s just easier to turn away from yourself. Until it’s not…and you realize the impact it’s actually having on yourself and those around you.

It happens, even after years of practicing intentional living. Accept and allow it without being too hard on yourself.

Becoming a Compassionate Warrior

Whatever your natural tendencies are, when you learn to view them without judgement, you naturally begin to invite compassion into you life.

In turning towards yourself, you begin to soften to the parts of you that you’ve worked so hard to harden over the years. And you actually become an even stronger warrior than you ever could be with just might alone. 

You become a compassionate warrior.

Health Harmony Happiness Take-aways

1. What if turning towards yourself meant you were actually becoming a warrior in the sense that you are an even stronger and more complete warrior when you’re equipped with not only the physical, but also the mental and emotional aspects of who you are.
2. In the meantime, remember that you’re human, and even after living more intentionally for years, we all have moments of turning away or desiring to turn away from ourselves.
3. Routine is so comforting, yet when you have to surrender to those times of being out of routine, you get a glimpse at what your natural tendencies are.

Resources:

To know where you are in your Energetic Rhythms Cycle, download the Daily Rhythms Tracker.

Join the Energetic Rhythms for Intentional Living community here.

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